Review: Watching and Wanting by Jay Northcote

Series: Housemates (book 4), but works as a standalone

Genre: LGBT (m/m, bisexual character), Romance

Rating: 4,5/5 stars

Cover: What’s not to like? Black and white photography works so well with erotic images.

Links: goodreads, author

Trigger warnings: none

Description: Watching Jude’s cam show stirs desires Shawn’s always denied…

Shawn is adrift. Recently graduated, he’s stuck in a dead-end job that barely pays the bills. His girlfriend dumped him, his friends have moved on, and he’s still in Plymouth—going nowhere.

Jude is a student living in the same shared house. Out and proud, he’s everything Shawn’s been running from since he hit puberty. When Shawn discovers Jude works as a cam boy, he can’t resist the urge to watch one of his shows. It makes Shawn want things that scare him, yet his fascination forces him to confront his attraction.

Keen to explore his bicurious side, Shawn suggests they do a show together. Jude agrees, and things get complicated—and kinky—fast. But Jude isn’t looking to get involved with someone so deep in the closet. If Shawn’s going to get what he wants, he needs to find the courage to stop hiding from himself and be honest about who he is.

Review: You really don’t need the other installments to understand this book, but after reading it, you so will want to read them.

I have never read about cam shows in a book, so I was curious how it would be handled. It is done very vividly and it isn’t used as a way to get the pairing interested in each other and then to be never heard from again.

I loved how flowing the writing is. I was sucked into the story right from the beginning and I really felt with the characters, if they were happy I was happy as well and if there was drama I was really depressed and suffered with them. It was exhausting but in a good way, if that makes any sense at all.

Shawn discovers he is bisexual, but he doesn’t accept it right away. The way he handled it and Jude as well, was very realistic. If you think you’re straight your whole life, you usually don’t get off when a guy is touching you and accept it right away, do you?

Overall I loved their relationship dynamic – both in the bedroom and outside of it. They’re just so… cautious with each other and consent is important to them (not just in the kinky sense). There’s no insta-love as well!

I will be definitely reading the other parts. Actually I’m reading Helping Hands right now.

Disclaimer: I received a free copy through the author in exchange for an honest review. Thank you.


The Gays need to Fuck!

I felt so bad typing this headline… but it sums up exactly what I want to talk about: the desire a lot of (female) readers have.

I’ve read quite a few reviews of m/m books on Goodreads and every so often (often enough or too often, take your pick) they’re like “But where was The Sex?!” Like… there are so many things wrong with that… on so many levels… I don’t even know where to start. But I’ll give it my best.

Stop sexualizing homosexual men! Oh my God!

I’d prefer to use something along the lines of LGBTQIA+ or MOGAI people, but it’s ‘somehow’ only about cis guys (because in that world view being trans* holds not the same worth (don’t get me started on this now, I will only say: this is so wroooooooong)) and of course only 100% gay counts. Nothing else. All other identities do not exist. And a guy with female parts? Ugh, gross. And of course no women are allowed to have major (and sometimes even minor) roles.

Of course The Gays have to be hot and they must have hot monkey sex as often as possible. Otherwise the book isn’t worth anything. Duh.

Regardless of genre, there has to be sex, otherwise they are not truly gay!

They are not gay, if they are not having sex on the pages. Homoromantic? What is that?

In Historical, Thriller, Crime, Fantasy, whatever, and yes even in Romance, a homosexual character doesn’t need to have sex to be a ‘true’ homosexual. What the fuck is wrong with you?! Being homosexual means to be sexually attracted by humans of the same gender. That’s it.

There is one genre I always feel extremely uncomfortable with, if people are criticizing the lack of sex: Young Adult. They are underage, people. You are fetishizing children, for fuck’s sake!

If there is no cock-in-ass-action it doesn’t count as sex!

This is another thing that truly pisses me off. Why does every sex scene have to be about anal sex? There are other things you can do to get yourself and/or your partner off (if that is your goal). Your (fantasy) sex life seems to be kinda boring, if that is the only thing you can think of.



I’ve wanted to write this blog post for ages. So many months I’ve thought about it, but I never had the right words. I’m not sure if those above are the right ones, but they are emotional ones for sure.

What do you think about ‘gay’ books? (If you know me, you know I prefer to describe a pairing as m/m, because most of the time the characters never identify as anything, so who am I to say they are gay, just because they are in love with, interested in or fuck another man?)

Do they need to fuck to make a book interesting or the pairing believable?